I Want Peace.

What a WEEK!

Last Wednesday I started out the day full of life and the world was a bright an colorful place! I got off work early, had a few errands to run, went to the mall and did some shopping with my mom and my little Kai, and by the time I laid down at night, I felt the aches coming on. I woke up Thursday morning with the full on flu. Went to work anyway. From then until now it's progressed into a full on sinus and throat infection complete with an ear infection. I have been experiencing a lot of personal growth in my life lately, and right there in the middle of it I felt like a big PAUSE button was pushed. I am happy to say that today is the first day I feel somewhat normal and I am more than ready to get back to our somewhat inconsistent routine.

When you are a free spirit and you are married to one, routine is something that is needed, but it is also something that you have to hold on to lightly. It does not come natural, nor does it always come easy. Here's one thing I have learned while trying desperately to add some sort of order to our life: DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU. It might not look completely organized to someone else. Your routine may look like a wild ride compared to your "soccer mom-super woman" friends, but if it works for you, don't be intimidated by what it does or does not look like. Don't compare, but challenge yourself to be better at the things that are priorities in you life. Take advice and glean from what other people who are on the same journey have learned. Be content, but never satisfied. Be strong, yet vulnerable, and tender yet tenacious.

Never give-up on yourself. Seasons always change, and so will you. Healthy things GROW and growing things CHANGE. Stay true to who you are, but always leave room for God to complete His work of purifying you.

These are all things that I am learning, and currently trying to grab ahold of. A song a friend of mine wrote once really drove home the point that God loves me just the way that I am, but He loves me too much to leave me that way. What a profound truth to grab ahold of! I feel comforted by this in one second and in the next, my insecurity puts her hands on her hips and in full on defense mode says, "Wait a second God, what's wrong with the way that I am?" And then the thought dances around in my head a little more and I am able to admit to God (like He didn't already know) that I don't really have it all together. I want to do a good job at life, but most days I have this underlying anxiety and feel like I am moments away from dropping the ball... What ball?! I don't even know! The ball that no one forced me to pick up in the first place. I'm not good at vulnerable, and coming to this point in our relationship with God, and even our spouses takes intimidating amounts of it. It goes without saying that God does not require my vulnerability in order to see past the outer layers, but why do we try so hard and even have it all pulled together when approaching Him? Vulnerability takes the focus off of fear, and places the focus on peace, and I want peace. My home can offer the most inviting, cozy, peaceful atmosphere, but if my mind and heart can not offer me a place to rest and be at peace with myself and my creator, it's all a charade. I am determined to get this right, not to the point of expecting perfection, but to the point of letting it sink in. I want it grab ahold of the restlessness inside of me and gently lay it to rest. It's getting closer, and it is with a humble heart that I can look and see God's unfailing love at work in me.

Still working on getting my blog, as well as other projects in my life, back to a level of consistency. My blog layout is a little anemic these days, so bear with me.

xoxo

Karis

2011

After just about a year long break, I am on my way back to the never ending inspiration, fresh creativity, laughter, support, shared passion and the beauty that never ends in the hearts of those who choose to go through this life searching for inspiration and daring to be brave enough to live creatively.

I do not like to lay out distinct resolutions at the beginning of each year. I take each new year as an opportunity to evaluate where my priorities have been the past year, and if any adjustments need to be made, I make them. (which is always the case, by the way.) This year has been a doozie! After many life altering moments and circumstances, I can honestly say that I love 2010 for all of the challenges, amazing memories, and fun times, but I was more than ready to welcome 2011 in. Upon my reflecting, It was quite obvious that there's just something that isn't the same as far as my creative outlets go. I design now for a living, but something was still definitely missing. I don't think that the one thing missing can be narrowed down to a blog, but I do think that it has been my long lost presence in the creativity realm. The past year has been so busy and so full of earth shaking... and some earth-shattering circumstances, that my energy levels have been completely focused on our new life in texas, my husband, my son, and my overall health. Sometimes you just have to put everything aside (even the "good" things that you like) so that you can focus on the things that matter most in life. I hope that as time progresses and I continue to find freedom and peace, I will have stories of triumph and personal victories to share, but for now I am just happy to be easing myself back into the mindset of aiming to inspire. I am not too sure exactly what it will look like, or how it will all play out, but I am sure that I am so ready to dive back into this world of unbelievable beauty that you all have helped create here on the world wide web.

My priorities for 2011 are quite simple, but all carry deep significance for me.

1. Maximize mornings.

This is something that I am not good at, have never been good at, and although I will probably never achieve to be a morning person, I can at least make the best of them. Here is just a little taste of what mornings look like for me...

...not so pretty, eh?!

2. Blog regularly. Find healthy creative outlets.

...workin' on it!

3. Focus on having a healthier view of food and eating.

This is something that can consume me if I let it. It's a struggle to have a healthy balance.

4. Purge the house. Get organized. Everything has to have a place.

Even if it looks like this... I'm totally OK with that!

5. Make a workspace in the new house and make things!

...this goes hand in hand with #2, but it's important enough for me to make it a stand alone priority. Maybe a future Etsy shop is on the horizon?!

6. Wear/buy brighter colors

I've had many requests lately to do a blog about my outfits and wardrobe. I'm loving the idea... but I've got to get out of the black and gray rut! As you can see I've already started working on it.... and future pictures will not just be of my shoes, by the way! =)

7. Settle into who I am and aspire to be and more importantly who God wants me to be, so I can stop worrying so much about my own aspirations. (Don't you just love how that works hand in hand?)

Happy 2011 everyone!

I will be seeing you on here much more often.

sometimes

Gray.

Do you ever just feel gray?

It's been a gray week in so many ways.

Weather wise is the most literal way. It's been just a preview of winter, with cool temps and overcast skies.

My week has been good, but has been rough at the same time.

Work was absolutely insane this week, but I have a job that I truly love and look forward to going to everyday.

I got some bad news, but I got some good news.

I had some breakthrough's but I had some set backs.

I lost a good friend, but made some really awesome new ones. (yes you, Sam!)

I didn't cook once, but I kept the house very clean.

One of my friends miscarried, one of my friends brought a new life into the world.

I am "out of my mind" homesick, but my dad bought me a plane ticket to Texas for next week.

I got sick again, but this week we are doing an acoustic set which won't require as much out of my vocal chords.

Had some tough counseling sessions with students and heard things that broke my heart, but get to speak into their hearts, love on them, be there for them and impact their lives in a positive way. (such an awesome blessing!)

I didn't know what to say, but God gave me the right words.

I'm down on myself today, but have an amazing husband who lifts me up, no matter what stupid thing I did this time.

It's been rainy and drizzling for days, but the leaves are turning bright shades of pink, red, orange and yellow.

Life is sometimes hard, but God is always good.

Weeks are sometimes long, but God is always good.

Days that should be bright and sunny are sometimes cold and cloudy, but God is always good.

Life throws us the unexpected, but God is always good.

We may lose our way, by God is always good.

Money may be tight, but God is always good.

Our bodies may be sick, but God is always good.

We sometimes make mistakes, but God is always good.

We are sometimes helpless, but God is always good.

We are sometime hopeless, but God is always good.

We may not understand, but God is always good.

Days may look like this:

But in the end:

...because God is always good.

"When you can't trace His hand, trust His heart."

2 Corinthians 4:17
"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all."

Romans 8:28
"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."

Strongly

I believe in God. Strongly. As a result, I believe in angels.

Some days I feel like my guardian angel must a bit like this.

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and His understanding no one can fathom.
Is. 40:28

this too shall pass

As small as it may sound, this phrase, accompanied by the awareness of a sovereign God in control, echoing in my thoughts has helped me survive my darkest seasons.

I feel as though every time I hear it, it resounds in my soul and lifts me ever so slightly higher.

Small, but powerful words if you truly believe them.

You! Yes, YOU!

Everyone deserves to be loved, and even if they don't seem to deserve it, everyone NEEDS to be loved. So make sure you love everyone.... even if you don't particularly like them. This is an area of my life that God is always working on. People have bad days. Just like you. Everyone should get the chance to experience the feeling of being truly loved by another.

It's been proved time and time again, love always wins.

I'll Take the Third Loft from the Left

I could stare at this picture of NYC all day, everyday and just day dream away!

This picture gives me butterflies.

Don't mind me, I'm just a silly city girl.

(click on the picture to enlarge, and start your day dreaming!)

Pink Clouds of Fluffy Goodness

Have we ever talked about how much I LOVE fresh cotton candy?!

jennipenni